I had it easy the first four months. My in-laws were here visiting from Spain, then my mother came pitch in watching the baby. Now she’s back home in Maine and I’m carrying Bodhi all over town. I arrange babysitters to look after him in the teachers’ lounges at each studio while I instruct my classes. Mother and son stay closer and connected. And Bodhi is absorbing AUM.
But it’s a lot of extra work. Packing the diaper bag full of sanitized toys and books, bottles of pumped breastmilk, fresh, clean swaddle blankets for him to play on, and lots and lots of diapers and wipes. Plus the routine of dressing him for travel and coaxing him into the carrier peacefully without fuss tacks on an extra half hour of commute time each direction because when I get there I need to set my little love bug up. We developed a ritual of organizing a play area, checking the diaper, feeding, and playing before mommy steps away. I help him ground before I center myself to teach my beloved students.
So I’ve been meditating on that very notion this past week… On my mat I’m thinking about how to LAND where I arrive. Fully there. Connected and present. Not fidgeting, not analyzing, not obsessing about my son with the sitter and wondering if he’s ok. I trust he is so I can commit to my time. And off my mat I’m practicing, too. An iPhone and news junkie, I’m learning to turn off the television and put down the devices to arrive and connect with my son who just wants his mommy to hold him, play with him, feed him, bounce him to sleep, cuddle with him, make him giggle, change his poopy pants, and teach him the world.
Life is always throwing us curveballs, and I find that the more I let go of my expectations of how I think things should be and stay open to what the Universe hands me the easier it is to LAND where I arrive. Fully there. Connected and present.
Ok, signing off to go play with the little man.
Lots of love,